You’re definitely not the only one who does this. I bet there could have been so many other people who could have written something similar to you. As I’ve said before on here I starve myself, make myself sick and go to the gym to work off the calories I’ve put on through eating etc. Everyone is different but I know to a certain extent how you feel and it is very difficult but it can be overcome. Have you spoken to your GP about this or are you getting any other type of support? If not it may be useful talking to your GP or someone you trust and try to get referred to someone who can help you professionally. I see a woman who is an eating disorder specialist and a psychologist. Previously I have seen three other people, however the woman I now see is very helpful and gives me that time to try and challenge my thoughts and feelings.

This may be a good idea when you feel fat - try to think of the reasons who you feel this way. Write down facts that are evidence you are fat and facts that are evidence you’re not fat and see which one out weighs the other - this may suprise you. It will hopefully put things into a better perspective to be able to deal with your thoughts and feelings.

Keep going, I’m sure you’re not fat. You can overcome this. Just remember your not fat.
Hope this helps xx

Thank you for the advice. Recently i told a friend of mine that not only do i skip meals i also make myself sick (i didnt tell him about the exercise as it isnt as bad as before). He looked dissapointed in me. He said i need professional help. He said he might tell one of the teacher/counceller in school - but he said he wont at the moment as we have our GCSE’s and it will get too stressful. I personally think it isn’t bad enough to get help but i wouldnt mind having a bit of professional guidence but i do not want my parents to find out because they would then control my food and watch me eat and that would be a nightmare. Over the past 2 weeks i have had 4 people ask me why i dont eat in school. Im just so scared. I dont like making decisions an i dont like uncertainty, im so scared he will tell a teacher, cuz if he does he will tell her soon, as we leave next month, i just think he is making a fuss about nothing. I just want to be skinny. He doent understand and it makes me feel so lonely and isolated. Also the teacher he will tell, will be dissapointed in me as i had to see her cuz of my selfharm, she said if i ever get sressed or need her help talk to her, but i havent. :( i dont know what to do. I just want to run away from everything.