19, 2nd year of university. I was dragged by a friend last year to my doctor for panic attacks and dissociative episodes, he told me it was just stress and to try breathing better. Not even kidding. I kept my appointments after that to keep my friend happy but they weren't helping, they might even have been making things worse. When I went home for the summer I stopped seeing them, and since I've come back for 2nd year things have gotten worse. I cut and burn myself, one of my flat mates keeps my pain meds in her room and only gives me them when I need them, sharp thingsstay out of my room and the bathroom just in case. I feel like I don't exist, like I'm living a stolen life. I don't know how much longer I can keep living a life that doesn't feel like mine but I'm too scared to go back to my doctor.