I’m at the end if my thether

My daughter is 15 and got into the wrong crowd who shown her to cut herself this was when she was 13. Summer holidays she was fine minute she went back to school Iv had it none stop, you don’t want to argue incase she cuts, doctors have referred to cams but that’s not for two weeks, I just don’t know what to do she won’t talk, she shows no respect, ect ect 😭 I just feel alone

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  • Ruth Ayres


    Thank you so much for using our parents forum, this is a really tough time for you and we want to support you as best we can. We have lots of parents get in tough with us feeling concerned about discipline worried that it will cause their children to harm. I think you need to try and remain as much as you can the adult in the situation, that is not say that you have to argue with your daughter but you must try where you can to keep boundaries.

    While you are waiting for CAMHS what about starting a communication book with your daughter where you can both write down how you are feeling and respond to each others entries. Try chatting to her in the car if you can, sometimes it can feel less threatening. Encourage her to text you if talking feels too much. Maybe do some research in to local charities that can help you and your daughter. It is excellent that you have already been to your GP, but the threshold for CAMHS can be high and you may need to think of some other forms of support while you wait and for the future.

    Finally we have some excellent resources including a parents guide to self-harm, you can buy these here https://www.youthscape.co.uk/store/project/selfharm

    Hope this helps


  • i am so sorry you are going through this; it takes you to the brink doesn't it? I wonder if the return to school is a major factor - how does she get on at school? it sound like it could be a big trigger? have you thought about talking to school to ask for a reduced timetable until CAMHS comes through? It might be helpful to her?