I was so confused when I first got bullied, like I didn't know why it was me being targeted. I thought maybe their just jealous of me in some way. But looking back on that situation, I cant help but feel like I changed my self. Like I was the one who 'decided' to be depressed, because i didn't understand how small and harmless words could possibly hurt anyone. I know people try to help, but for me, i haven't found anything that helps beside from sleeping in for hours and taking myself away from the real world. Id do anything to quit self harming, but a small part of me feels like it shouldn't go away. For two reasons. One, because i went throught that and i got over it. But then theres a second one, because i did that to myself, it was me who put those cuts and scars where they are, they need not to leave, they should stay, just to prove how much of a despicable human being i am. I hate it, but i cant help it. No matter how hard i try, or how much help i receive, nothing is working. Please let me know how you cope, because at the moment i know I'm not ok, I'm just to afraid to talk about it in person.